So! Upon the arrival of my break-up with Eli (after a couple weeks let's be honest) I have realized that I have learned more than I ever could've just listening to someone else give relationship "tips". So, I guess it wouldn't hurt to share mine. (You can take them or leave them. Up to you. If I were you though, I would take them and save yourself the trouble.)
1. Don't limit yourself
If there is something that is important in a high school career it's not limiting yourself to one person. Trust me, I understand the whole "but if I go on a date with more than one person at a time everyone is going to view me as a slut". WRONG. Yes, there are the narrow-minded few but, growing up LDS, I have found that there is some real logic in going on multiple dates at one time. You get a feel for what you do and don't want in an eternal companion. (And, eternity is a long time to spend with one person, but when you find the right person, eternity isn't near long enough.) High school is LITERALLY a crash course career in dating.
2. Be who you want them to be
When I was little, and every year since I have a made a list of the things I want in an eternal companion. Some things like "Strong Testimony", "Unwavering Faith", "Kind", "Compassionate, understanding, smart, funny" and various other things have made the list every year. However, if you want a faithful, worthy, Christ like king, you too must a faithful, worthy and Christ like queen. In the words of Brother Farr: "If God was to place you with a man (or woman) who is worthier than you, that would be a curse to them." You don't want your "perfect" king to be stuck with a queen who doesn't hold the same standards, have the same strong testimony, or is lacking in any way in the gospel. Don't let yourself be a walking curse.
3. Stand in Holy Places...at all times, in all things, and in all places
All I am going to say about this one is that if you have the Spirit with you, anywhere you go is a Holy Place because YOU are a walking holy place.
4. Stare down tempation
Temptation of any kind ruins a relationship. A relationship should be built on trust, Christ and everything good. You shouldn't have to be walking around with baggage and worry of going too far, or messing up your eternal destiny as a child of God. And, sometimes the only answer is to end the relationship, and end the temptation. But, don't just call it quits before working on it.
From a girls standpoint: Yeah, we get blamed a lot for the temptation of guys and we tend to resort to the excuse of "Well, guys should be able to control themselves" but, let's be honest with ourselves ladies, just like you can't control what you see on the computer or the TV guys can't control what they see when you reveal it so explicitly in your clothing. Even though the low cut shirt or the short skirt with the flowers are SUPES CUTE you really want to do that to a guy? Subjecting him to forced violation of his and your spirit? Negative ghostrider. And, I know, I'm not really the one to talk about modesty but, take it from me. Cover. It. Up. And, if my telling you in one worded sentences doesn't work maybe this will:
Close your eyes for a moment...now think about this: when you wear short skirt, tight shirts, revealing articles of clothing you have not just that "cute guy in math class" staring at you, but, you also have grandpa's, older men, women's husbands, your bishop, and your own dad looking at the same thing. Your body. If you're gonna get a guy, do it with your personality not your body. Gross.
*Note: If it so happens that you guys do break up (like me and Eli) think about this: Sure, it feels like a punishment to you that you're all of a sudden being punished for him not being able to control himself but you guys being together is a punishment to him. He shouldn't have to be forced to face that tempation day after day, left to his own faculties to deal with it alone. SOLUTION: BE FRIENDS! It's way better.
Well, this only a few of the raindrops of wisdom that I have to add to your lake of knowledge but it's enough for now.
Like I said, you don't have to take the advice I gave you but, I guess if you don't it's your choice. Go ahead, find out that I'm right the hard way.
AND WHATEVER YOU DO! DON'T DO SOMETHING PERMANENT JUST BECAUSE OF A TEMPORARY FEELING. YOU'LL REGRET IT LATER.
OH ONE MORE THING! DON'T TAKE AWAY FROM HIS SPIRIT OR YOUR SPIRIT. THAT MAKES FOR AN EMPTY RELATIONSHIP OF ANY KIND.
And if there is anything that Eli has taught me in this relationship it's that everything goes both ways. He's taught me to love everyone, and apologize when I am wrong, and a lot more things that would be left unlearned without him.
OVER AND OUT.
